accomplished twins. life is a go
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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