Im at strip club and am horny
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
