I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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