The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
