I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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