Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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