Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Randomize
