And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
