she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
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