thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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