I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
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Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
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did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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