can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
