Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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