he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
cat food counts as protein by the way
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
