I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
