How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Randomize
