erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize