i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize