i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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