So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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