so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
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