69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
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just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
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