Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
a search helicopter?!
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize