But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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