i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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