dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Randomize
