ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
