I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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