Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
