Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize