I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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