i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
