I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Randomize