Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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