Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize