Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
he fucked my hip out of place.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
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