I understand why you refuse to be sober now
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've created a new STD.
So much rum. So many feels.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
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