He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
