woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Randomize
