You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
