dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
