can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
