so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
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Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
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I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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