I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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