The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize