why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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