You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
So much Jack, so little girl.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize