She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Randomize
