found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
