I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
