Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Randomize
